Miners talking at Labor Day celebration, Silverton, Colorado.

Photo courtesy of Lee, Russell, 1903-

In honor of Labor Day, this Sunday I thought I’d share a classic poem by Walt Whitman “I Hear America Singing.” In his poem, Whitman celebrates work in America from the carpenter to the ploughboy to the mother and wife. Together, with all of their hard work, Whitman sees these workers giving of themselves and contributing to society. Admittedly, Whitman’s poem paints a picture of another time in our county; the workers that Whitman honors are manual laborers, whose work is divided along traditional gender lines. Today, workers come from many backgrounds, with varying levels of education, and men and women are crossing into fields where decades ago they could not go. At the same time, in July 2008, the unemployment rate in the U.S. rose to 5.7 percent; many Americans are looking for work.

In Whitman’s time and in our own, all the work accomplished across our country may not necessarily be done in merriment and song, but what I think Whitman is getting at, is that all these workers, doing their own thing, trying to survive and live in the U.S., are collectively creating a “song” of unity in their efforts.

I Hear America Singing

I hear America singing, the varied carols I hear,
Those of mechanics, each one singing his as it should be blithe and strong,
The carpenter singing his as he measures his plank or beam,
The mason singing his as he makes ready for work, or leaves off work,
The boatman singing what belongs to him in his boat, the deckhand singing on the steamboat deck,
The shoemaker singing as he sits on his bench, the hatter singing as he stands,
The woodcutter’s song, the ploughboy’s on his way in the morning, or at noon intermission or at sundown,
The delicious singing of the mother, or of the young wife at work, or of the girl sewing or washing,
Each singing what belongs to him or her and to none else,
The day what belongs to the day-at night the party of young fellows, robust, friendly,
Singing with open mouths their strong melodious songs.

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Yesterday afternoon while Annabelle napped and my husband biked, I sat down to work on my application to become a leader of a local parenting group. Completing this application will likely take me a month or two as there is much reading, reflection, and answering of questions. One of the more valuable questions on the application simply asks why an applicant wants to become a leader. In a roundabout way, I explained that participating in the group offered me great hope and support when I was a new parent and that it encouraged me to make decisions, as a parent, that resonated with what my heart was telling me to do.

But, as I thought about my answer, I remembered the earliest months at home with a newborn. Gosh, it wasn’t easy. My husband and I lived without sleep (though even in our most delirious states still managed to smile and be grateful for the helpless baby who needed us). I remember feeling so afraid the day he returned to work from his week at home; now, caring for a newborn was my responsibility for at least 8 hours out of the day. Within a few days, I adjusted and came to love spending time with my baby; however, once I got the hang of changing diapers, soothing a crying baby, and managing our home, I wished that I had someone to talk with, commiserate with, and gain some insight about my role as a mother and how my previous life roles were changing.

In a sense, I sent my hope out into the universe; I was searching for co-workers, friendship, and a community where I belonged. Shortly thereafter, another full time mom invited me to attend a breastfeeding support group and a babywearing meeting. There I met many new and veteran mothers who not only enjoyed discussing how to soothe a crying baby and talk about whether or not my baby was eating enough, but who genuinely cared to help out an amateur mom, like myself. The best part of meeting these women was that I came across advice and encouragement about child rearing and nurturing a family that “felt” right to me.

I imagine that many religious people consider prayer to be the way to communicate their hopes, intentions, and desires to the universe, or a higher power. Having experienced many trying times in my life (as we all do), I have found spirituality and the ability to turn within myself to be so comforting and worthwhile. Early in my pregnancy, my provider informed me that my HCG levels were low, which suggested that I had an ectopic pregnancy and would eventually miscarry. My heart broke. Becoming a mother had long been a dream of mine, and I was devastated that I might be losing my baby. I read and read to learn more about my possible medical condition, but I have to tell you that none of the knowledge I acquired was comforting; it was only at night or while taking walks by myself that I was able to quiet myself and feel any peace. My heart spoke to something greater than myself and I felt hope.

Whatever our beliefs are in this life, we can feel more connected to each other, more hopeful, and perhaps even better guided if we are able to send out our intentions. When my father was suffering from cancer, I attended a group who helped me visualize and send healing energy to my dad; my hope was that he would not feel any more pain. A few days later he passed away. Admittedly, his passing and the events surrounding it can be interpreted in so many ways. The way I choose to see things is that my hopes for my father were answered.

Because Green Mamma is a place where I come to talk about parenting and the environment, let me bring this post back to it; there are so many folks on the internet and all around the world who care about working towards a healthier planet. Being able to reach our goal, collectively, to care for this earth and make it a livable place for generations to come, is possible, I think; although it is my opinion that such a goal would be more attainable if each and every day those of us who are working on behalf of the earth simply quiet our minds and express our hopes, wishes, and intentions for it. At the very least, such an exercise helps with focus, and when are focused, we can achieve most anything.

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Inspired by my new Nikon camera, this week’s gratitude post is about light. Most of us are familiar with phrases like “shed some light”, “let there be light,” and “keep in the sunlight.” One of my favorite quotes about light was written by Edith Wharton: “There are two ways of spreading light; to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.” Light is thought to be a symbol of creation, truth, understanding, generosity, altruism, life, purpose, and hope, and that is only naming a few. In photography, light is technically important for letting the camera achieve an image that mimics what the eye sees.

What I love about taking photos is that it helps me to notice beauty wherever I go. Throughout my day I find my eyes searching for color, shape, form, texture, and more, and then, I think about whether or not such a photo would be taken in good light.

Of course, there are times when my eyes and mind notice something beautiful and I forgot or have no access to my camera. When this happens, my husband is quick to remind me that our experiences are what matter most. “Make a memory,” he says. So here are a few memories, or rather, moments from our everyday where I notice beauty and make an imprint upon my mind:

At daybreak, I see

a slumbering baby nestled next to her dad

fog hovering over purple echinacea

runners and bikers with the roads to themselves

and deer grazing on wild grass

At midday, I see

red, blue, green, silver, and bronze cars crowding local plazas

Annabelle excitedly waving her arms, dancing to hip hop in the backseat of my car

ducks basking in the sun and waiting for generous visitors

and shadows cast on purple echinacea

At 5 o’clock when the sun softens, I see

neighbors returning home from work

my husband and daughter weeding our vegetable garden

mosquitoes leaving their mark

and smoke rising from summer barbeques

At dusk when lights go out, I see

the outline of Toby’s tail as he walks across our bed

tall trees swaying outside of our windows

laugh lines on my husband’s face as he watches Jon Stewart

and a busy toddler fast asleep, my baby once again.

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Our family’s efforts to go green coincided with my discovery of the famous Fly Lady, an on-line personal assistant who works day and night to guide folks living in CHAOS (Can’t Have Anyone Over Syndrome) to a life of order, organization, routine, and an environment that is clutter free. As I’ve mentioned time and time again to you, readers, greening my life and decluttering our home emerged while I was pregnant and nesting. Luckily, I became well acquainted with eco-friendly ways to dispose of our clutter, selling and giving away our belongings on Craig’s List and Freecycle. I decluttered with such enthusiasm that my husband once dreamed that I had freecycled pictures of our newborn! (No, I never freecyled pictures of my own daughter, but apparently I was getting rid of so much stuff that my husband worried that I might freecyle him and our daughter).

What I have noticed since decluttering our home and implementing a routine (even loosely followed) is that I manage to accomplish more–much more than I ever imagined possible. Creativity flows for me when my sink isn’t full of dishes, toys aren’t scattered all over the floor, and the laundry is tended to daily. I am (prepare yourselves for a confession) one of those people that thrives on external order, and it is my feeling that when my home and world are (or seem to be) in order, I am better prepared to manage the inner workings of my life.

Greater still, than being able to manage one’s personal life, I think, is having the energy to do something about chaos in the greater world. Over the years, being the do-gooder that I aspired to be, I have learned that there are many, many causes out there that need attention. Many people want to contribute, on some level, to making a difference, and one way or another, folks usually find a purpose or cause that they live for. Focusing on a single cause or two, though, makes it more likely that one’s efforts can be channeled towards real change that means something for the world.

My present causes include working (and writing) to protect and care for the earth’s environment, and to be a domestic do-gooder who raises a family that is mindful of the planet’s health, as well as the well-being of people all over the world. Regarding my first cause, the environment, my hope is that my children’s generation will be able to walk outside and not have to pick up garbage off the side of the road. Littering, pollution, and all things contributing to global warming will be in decline; our children will revere the earth and each other. Yes, I have a dream.

Getting the earth’s climate in order is no small dream. It is tempting to be pessimistic and list all of the ways our environment is going to h*** in a handbag. But I belong more to the school of “the glass is half full,” and so instead, here are a few thoughts on order and harmony as I see it manifest in our environment:

I notice order and harmony when I see. . .

a cloth diapered baby

yard composts

high heeled ladies and oxford soled men cycling to work

stay-cationers

vegetable gardens

groceries in cloth bags

used book stores

the Goodwill

clean roads

farmers’ markets

stream and water monitoring

recycling centers

green blogs, growing, growing, growing with crunchy, practical green thoughts

A small victory for me, as an environmentalist, was noticing that our local YMCA implemented a recycling program by simply taping “RECYCLE” signs to several former trashcans. Over the past few months, each time I visited the Y, I left a comment about there not being a recycling effort in place and how I would love to participate in setting it up. While no one ever contacted me to help with set-up, I can’t tell you how happy I was to walk past the new recycling program that is underway at the Y.

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Last week Everyday Woman announced her intention to include a gratitude post each week which she calls Thankful Thursday. Inspired by the poetic prose of her entry, I have decided to make a change to my own gratitude post. I plan to introduce a gratitude word of the week, which I hope to reflect on throughout my week so that not only am I aware of how I have been blessed by life but so that I practice being mindful of what is most important to me.

This week I have chosen the word “forgive” to inspire my gratitude post. I thought about how I interact with the word “forgive” on a personal level and having held those thoughts for several days have decided that what craves forgiveness on my behalf is actually myself. And so I forgive and am grateful for it . . .

I forgive myself for raising my voice with my daughter. . .

I thank the universe for her everyday. My daughter is my precious love.

I forgive myself for making promises that I wish I had not made . . .

I am grateful for the opportunities presented so that I might flex my soul and try new things.

I forgive myself for quitting . . .

I now know that it’s okay to fail and move on from it.

I forgive myself for worrying . . .

The world is beyond my control and sometimes terrible events turn out to be wonderful blessings.

I forgive myself for holding grudges . . .

I shudder to think how many good times I have missed out on for staying angry over petty things.

I forgive myself for guzzling a gallon of gasoline each week . . .

may my children forgive me too.

I forgive myself for being a perfectionist . . .

the world is perfect in its imperfections, and yet, time and time again, I find myself straightening up a clean room or tidying up the yard when I should be spending time with my family.

I forgive my impatience . . .

everything will happen in its own time and life is sweeter when I am not rushing out the door.

I forgive myself for having impossible standards . . .

my true friends don’t care whether my house is clean, my hair is combed, or whether I am mother or wife of the year. I suspect that some of the qualities that I loathe about myself are what others like about me anyway.

And last, I forgive myself for manging at 10 p.m. when I really should just drink a glass of water . . .

snacking is so yummy though!

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The other night as I was dressing Annabelle after her bath, she looked up at me and then reached for her pajama bottoms, which I was holding. She patted her chest and her eyes spoke, saying, “I want to do it myself, this time.” Since we are incorporating the Montessori approach into our lives, I asked her, “Do you want to try?” to which she responded, “Aye,” her way of saying yes. I immediately handed over the bottoms and then spontaneously took off my own pants, sat on the floor, and showed her how to hold her pants open and stick one leg into a pant leg at a time before standing up and pulling the pants the rest of the way up. After a few tries, we two headed for the hallway where she demonstrated her new pants putting on skills to her dad. All 3 of us clapped for her.

Like any attached mother might feel, I was beaming with pride that my daughter could put on her own pants and is taking steps away from me (learning to dress oneself is a major achievement in my book) but at the same time I got teary eyed just thinking about all the other milestones ahead of us, and how meaningful each one will be and how each step she takes is actually one step further away from her mom and dad. Recognizing that it is time to let go (even just a little bit) is difficult for me, and yet, I want my daughter to be able to do things for herself, to be her own person, and to trust me and her father enough to be able to go away from the nest and live her own life.

This week I feel large with gratitude. Here’s why:

1. Coffee. Yes, I am aware of how coffee trade influences global warming, and most of the time I refuse to touch the stuff (having sworn it off after long sleepless nights in college when I stayed up writing to meet deadlines). This week, though, I confronted a new beast in the no sleep department of parenting (marathon teething and nursing to be precise), and for the first time since Annabelle’s first 6 weeks of life, I felt that I needed a cup of joe to survive the day after having had no sleep. My dear Annabelle has the unique ability of waking up throughout the night (and I wonder, when does this child sleep?) but then getting up in the morning as if the last 9 hours never happened, being able to bounce around the house and begging her sleep deprived mamma to head outside to the pool. Aye, yay, yay. Thank you to the coffee gods (or Starbucks) for supplying me with the good stuff this week.

2. Kid Sharing. Two of my good friends and I are starting to swap a few hours of our child care responsibilities, so that one is free to pursue her interests while the other mom mothers 2 kids rather than 1 (all 3 of us are first time parents with only 1 child). What I am noticing from our arrangement is that: 2 kids play together, explore, and operate within their own universes, keeping each other busy, however, without frequent breaks in play (like changing the environment, having a snack, turning on the music), 2 kids turns out to be more time for mom to referee play (share please, touch your friends gently, etc.). Caring for 2 children has also opened my eyes to the logistics and added strength (physical and mental) needed for mothering more than 1 child; for example, lifting up 2 little ones and navigating a short walk from the car to a destination (say, the duck pond) is no easy venture. Moms of more than 1, I am in awe of you.

3 . New bloggy friends. I am meeting so many green minded people and it makes me so happy! I love being with like minded people, sharing ideas, and learning from each other (although I also enjoy people who challenge my ideas and who make me think about why I believe something or do something a certain way). Making new bloggy friends is something like discovering several new universes since reading a blog is a bit voyeuristic and allows us to peak into the lives of someone else. Recently I have discovered the following blogs, whose writers offer new ideas, pieces of themselves (or their families), and beautiful things (like photography and green suggestions). Go check them out:

Collecting Leaves . . .

Hippie Dippie Bebe

Musings of An Everyday Woman

4. Mamma Mia. Yesterday my husband and I dropped our daughter with a friend and headed for the movie theater intending to the see The Dark Knight, but we arrived late and no surprise, the movie was sold out. Secretly I hoped to see Mamma Mia but didn’t suggest it since musical theater is not one of my husband’s favorite outlets. What I couldn’t have predicted though was that we both actually laughed and cried while watching this film (we both laughed when Pierce Brosnan sang . . . strange to see James Bond singing, although he has a nice voice). Meryl Streep gave an incredible and energetic performance as Donna Sheridan, the owner of a hotel on a Greek island. Throughout the film I found myself identifying with both Donna, who loves her daughter more than life itself, and her daughter Sophie, who is about to be married and who is desperate to find out who she is. Scenes with Meryl Streep, Christie Baranski, and Julie Walters never failed to be flamingly flamboyant (loved the sparkling ABBA costumes on these 3 ladies). I totally loved this movie, and oh, it was nice to be on a date with my husband, too.

5. Quiet Sunday Mornings. This morning I woke up first, came downstairs, opened the windows, and sat down to write. It has been such a treat to be able to write in quiet without the hubbub of our home happening behind me or under me (depending on where I write). Of course, without the hubbub of my home, I fear that I would have no inspiration or desire to write. Still, the quiet of a Sunday morning (by myself) and the promise of a day ahead spent with my family is satisfying.

I hope that anyone who stops by and reads my gratitude post this week will also enjoy a relaxing Sunday, and if not, I hope you’ll find time for yourself (even if that means hiding in your in-laws bathroom for a few moments of peace; hey, family can be challenging). However your day unfolds, may it be a happy one.

Cheers,

Green Mamma

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Oh the joys of teething! Annabelle’s poor mouth is sore as all . . . well, you get the drift. And Annabelle’s poor mamma and daddy are tired as all . . . yeah.

Starting Sunday night, my dear little girl has been waking up and yelping from the pain of Mother Nature’s gift to all who must eat: teeth. Starting in December around the time of her first birthday, my little baby has cut 13 teeth! Yes, she’s a champion teether, and what that adds up to are a tired, cranky baby and 2 tired, cranky, and somewhat desperate parents. I keep telling myself, “And this too shall pass.” Physically, I’m about, how do you say, uh, dead tired?!?

But there’s always a few reasons to turn our heads up to the sky and shout, “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Or at least, on days (and weeks, and yes, months too) like this, I tell myself that the universe is full of love and that all I need do is open my eyes to its abundance. Here are a few neat reasons that I’m feeling the love this week:

1. Miracles. All right, by now, anyone who regularly reads Green Mamma knows that I can be a bit of a drama queen, so when I say “miracles,” I could be referring to the fact that our local grocery store now carries my favorite brand of soy ice cream. But this week, I seriously mean that I am totally stoked with the universe and its miracle. What miracle have I witnessed? Click here to see a beautiful slide show about the ugliness of plastic bags. Now, you may wonder why this slide show is such a miracle. Well, once upon a time, when I was just a wee green baby, my own mom was living a crunchy lifestyle involving breastfeeding, co-sleeping, sewing, crafting, recycling, and wearing her hair long like a hippie. But then her circumstances changed and she slowly bid adieu to her crunchy green mamma lifestyle so that she could become a full time working mamma. Over time, her long flowing hair was replaced by a tight perm and shoulder pads, and living green became a remnant of the past. Decades passed. I grew up and turned out to be pretty crunchy, and well, a little different than my brother and sister. Meanwhile, I started suggesting that my relatives recycle, buy used goodies, and stay mindful of Mother Earth. On one visit with the fam, I stopped by the local recycling center in my mom’s town and picked up a nifty recycling bin for her (I reasoned that helping her make a small change would encourage her to think about other great ways she could pitch in and protect the environment). Begrudgingly, she recycled her bottles and newspapers, starting frequenting consignment shops for gifts for her grandkids, and now brings her own reusable cloth bags to the grocery store. I consider these changes no small miracle. My mom is a busy lady who is dedicated to her job, traveling to see her grandkids, and spending time with our family who live all over the world (from Timbuktu, PA to Switzerland). So I figure, if my mother can be “one of those people” who sends e-mails encouraging other folks to live green, then well, there really is hope for our planet’s health and vitality. Again, to view the awesome slide show she sent me, click here.

2. Corn on the Cob. If there ever were a way for parents to recognize the value and joy had in their children growing teeth, let it be corn on the cob! One of Annabelle’s favorite new eats is crunchy corn right off her very own cob. Just watching her take a bite into corn on the cob, pull away with a mouthful of kernels, and then leave a tiny mark on her cob that matches her small, toddler-sized mouth is enough to make this mamma happy to endure the trials of her toddler’s teething.

3. Meal Planning. The last time I considered meal planning was around the time that gasoline rose above $4 per gallon. I thought that one of the ways that our family might save a few bucks and help reduce our food cartin’ carbon footprint would be to plan out our meals and their ingredients, make one trip to the grocery store per week, and to buy appropriately — no more and no less than what we needed. I filed this idea away until I attended my daughter’s 18 month check up. There, we learned that Annabelle is a bit on the small size as far as weight is concerned (she’s in the 5th percentile) but is a little bit tall (in the 75 percentile for her height). My husband suggested we make a better effort to encourage her to eat meals since she tends to an excited toddler (gosh there’s a lot to see and learn!). So, starting 2 weeks ago, we sat down to map out a menu for our week. Alternating between vegetarian and veggie/omnivore compromises, we ate a meal together every night (more on our vegetarian/omnivore compromises to come later this week). On Sunday night we weighed her again and she was nearly 1.5 lbs. heavier! I wish I could tell you that her improved diet is helping her to sleep better, but well, I’ve already shared a bit about the story of sleep in our house this week . . .

Meanwhile, sitting down for a shared meal is giving my husband and me more quality time to talk about our days, is reducing our grocery bill (it also helps that I am shopping less at Whole Paycheck, or um Whole Foods), and I’ve been told that sharing a mealtime may help encourage a healthy body image among girls. Click here to read more about the benefits of sharing meals and encouraging a healthy body image.

4. Ideal Bite. Ideal Bite and Treehugger.com are two of my favorite resources for researching green topics. This week I wanted to find out more about eco-conscious beautification, or green personal care, so I stopped in at Ideal Bite and got the details I neede. For example, from the Chicago Ideal Bite, I learned that greening my nail polish helps keep some 10,000 chemicals out of the waste stream! 10,000! Wow! I love that Ideal Bite highlights the amazing green outcomes had by making small, eco-friendly changes to our lifestyles. Ideal Bite rocks.

5. Innovative Breastfeeding Advocates. This week I learned that Nicola Hart, age 22, created a breastfeeding chair to assist and encourage breastfeeding mothers to nurse their babies in public. According to the BBC, Hart designed her breastfeeding chair to provide support and good posture for nursing mothers, as well as privacy wings, which are shields on the chair that allow nursing mothers to be discreet when breastfeeding their children in public (and to cope with onlooker’s negative attitudes). While I am a breastfeeding advocate who believes in exposing the public to the idea of feeding our children wholesome natural foods (like breast milk), I also understand the feeling of nursing my child in the midst of disapproving stares. However, when given the chance, I am happy to breastfeed my daughter and talk openly with others about what a beautiful and healthy experience nursing has been for me and my child.

And so, I open my eyes and pay attention to what is good in life, and I am free to see the universe and its bounty of love and hope. These are my reasons for saying thank you this week. What are yours?

Have a wonderful week. Hugs from Green Mamma.

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Gratitude Monday, thank goodness for you! Today I am snuggled up and writing beside a sleeping Annabelle.   We are home in Virginia and for this I am glad.  This morning I woke up, ate breakfast with my daughter, headed outside with her for a run, and took my time getting from Point A to Point B (which involved Starbucks and the swimming pool).   As I think back on our trip to Connecticut last week, I realize now that I fail to appreciate how lucky I am to be able to spend time with my daughter, one on one, almost every day.

Of course, my husband and I enjoyed sharing her with her grandparents and cousins while we visited with them, but at the same time, we both admitted that we missed our Annabelle and wanted her back (my are we selfish parents!  Though it’s a good sign, I think, that we both love spending time with our little girl).
Today I feel grateful for many parts of my life, and they are:

1. Friends.   In the words of John Lennon, “I get by with a little help from my friends.”  Old friends, new friends (who I always hope will grow to be old friends), parent friends, work friends.  Everyone wants a friend.  And, it is good to be with our friends.  While visiting in Connecticut, I was lucky enough to cross paths with my old friend Abbie, who authors Farmer’s Daughter and is an exemplary environmentalist and teacher.  I introduced her to Annabelle, toured her family’s farm market, and saw her beautiful home that is tucked away on a back road in Connecticut.   Anais Nin spoke of friends, saying that each friend represents a world within us that is not born until we meet a particular friend; I couldn’t agree more.  Old friends represent those past versions of ourselves, good and bad, and help us to stay connected to those older selves.  Once upon a time, Abbie knew me as an idealistic English student who thought she would never marry or settle down in the world; learning and seeing the world were most important to me.  Years later I have a husband and a child and am, for the most part, settled.  My priorities have changed but indeed, my idealism endures.  Thank you to Abbie for letting me remember who I was and being friends with the ever changing being that I am.

And then of course, I returned home to Virginia and couldn’t wait to dial up my girlfriends who I missed seeing over the last week.  I also stopped by some of my favorite blogs to see what idealistic green folks/crafters/mammas are up to.  I talked with my girlfriend Melody today and was reminded of why I am making certain life decisions and not others; Melody often has to say nothing and only offers me the chance to articulate my perception of the world and its goings on.  I walk away from most conversations with her feeling like the weight of the world has been lifted, that life will work out in the long run, and that things will be okay.   So, I thank goodness for my friends!

2. Connecticut.   Once upon a time, my husband and I called Connecticut “home.”  It is the place of our childhoods, where our families are, and where we got our starts in life.  Each time we return home, we reconnect with our roots and of course, the people who made us who we are today.  While our main purpose for going to Connecticut was to help out my husband’s brother after his bike accident, we also tried to fit in kid-friendly, mini-adventures in New Haven county.   We drove up to East Rock in the Yale neighborhood of New Haven and peered out at a view of New Haven and Hamden (a sight that is both industrial and yet full of lush green woods), played in the sand and seaweed at Lighthouse Point in New Haven with my niece and nephew, and toured and hiked 2 nature/environmental parks with all 3 kids.  Connecticut features much historic travel and natural beauty, much that I overlooked or simply did not know about during the many years I lived there.

3. Accessible Environmentalism.  Being green is often easy, but getting started as an environmentalist can be daunting to say the least.  While I was in Connecticut, 2 environmental centers we visited put big smiles on my face because they encouraged everyone, including kids, to care for the earth.  The first center, Sleeping Giant Park showed visitors that being green is as easy as using “the John.” There, I saw this sign:

While I am not sure how Sleeping Giant Park recycles the sludge from their toilet systems, I am happy that any literate visitor, adult or child, can read this sign above the toilets; at the very least, folks may take notice that the local park is taking action on behalf of the environment.  Perhaps readers of the sign will think about what they can do for  our planet too?  I can only hope so.

The second time I smiled was at the Kellogg Environmental Center.  Kellogg E.C. encourages local schools, families, and the overall community to learn about the natural environment; their center features turtles swimming through a small tank (a great hands on activity for reluctant readers), as well as many exhibits about native animals and plants, as well as invasive species.  However, the display that made me smile (and laugh too) discussed how to keep a compost and how to get our children involved.  My nephew Charlie and I studied the processes involved and he giggled when I told him that worm poop helps create healthy, rich soil for our plants.  I suppose I could have related the bigger ideas from this composting display more eloquently, but overall, I was excited to see that places like the Kellogg Environmental Center are working to include the next generation of environmentalists in the task of protecting and caring for our earth.

4. Earth Friendly Companies.  In the coming week I plan to share details about my next free giveaway, a reusable bag created by a company that repurposes coffee bean sacks.  Check in later this week to learn more.

5.  Home.  I think this post is testimony to my appreciation for being at home.  Getting away for a bit is a great reminder to me that the mundane life is rich in meaning, that our problems are important (we can learn from them), and that tasks that seem tedious (like housework and diaper changing) are actually blessings in disguise (I like to think about world peace and improving living conditions around the world as I sweep floors, wash dishes, and yes, change diapers).  My home really is my castle, and gosh, I have turned into quite a homebody.  There really is no place like home.

And so those are my thoughts on the past week.  Thank you for letting me share.  Have a great week!

Green Mamma

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Happy Sunday folks. This weekend my family headed out of town to visit relatives in New England. Unfortunately, our visit was prompted by a phone call from my mother-in-law informing us that my brother-in-law had been in a motorcycle accident and was injured. The good news is that he is alive. Today we saw him for the first time since his accident and he seemed to be in as good spirits as one can be when recovering from a bad accident. And even though the hospital can be a scary place for kids, Annabelle was delighted with her uncle’s balloons, an amazing fountain in the lobby, and a huge elephant constructed out of leggos.

So, in the coming week, I will likely be tending to family matters, caring for my daughter, and being there for my husband, his brother, my niece and nephew and my mother-in-law. What that translates to is a lot of time spent at the hospital, my mother-in-law’s home, and playing with the kiddos in the pool and around the house. I may not be able to post as much, but I will be here in spirit! Keep e-mailing me and commenting . . . I so enjoy participating in discussions over parenting, the environment, education, green vaccinations, etc.

But before I go, I will share a few of my favorite reasons for being alive this week, and they are:

1. My family is healthy right now. Despite health scares in our extended family, another relative’s emergency trip to the hospital (she’s okay), and the loss of two loved ones in the past 6 months, my husband, my daughter, and I are in great health right now. Observing the health conditions of those around us during this time has made me appreciate and not take for granted the fact that my husband can walk up a flight of stairs and ride his bike 6 miles to work a few times a week, that my daughter runs around our neighborhood and our house keeping me on my toes and as active as can be, and that I am able to get up each morning and run before taking on a full day of mothering. We are lucky that we can do these things. So many folks are not physically able to do so.

2. Yogurt and the wondrous lactobacteria. Okay, this is a bit embarrassing, but I have to share with you. A few weeks I go I needed to take antibiotics for a sinus infection that exploded into a nasty ear infection. Weeks later I suffered the uncomfortable side effects of taking antibiotics: it wreaks havoc on one’s digestive system by eliminating all bacteria, including the good bacteria that helps regulate digestion and our health. To remedy my condition, I ate, oh maybe 8 cups of yogurt a day to replace the good bacteria that my stomach needed. To read what Dr. Sears has to say about the benefits of eating yogurt and ingesting lactobacteria, click here.

3. Other Environmentalists. This week my girlfriend Melody forwarded this awesome You Tube video to me about folks living in a self-sustaining way, growing their own food in their front and back yards (yes, this is a true story of green living right inside suburbia). Not only do they collect rain water to maintain their gardens, but they grow artichokes in their front yard! I am so inspired!

4. My “Village.” My immediate family consists of my husband, my daughter, and me. Our parents live out of state, as do our siblings and cousins. After reading Sharon Heller’s The Vital Touch and reflecting on her discussion about a child’s need to be touched and held by his parents and other loved ones, I wondered at how, in this day and age, nuclear families in the U.S. (and much of the world) who live apart from their “clans” are able to give their children the love and affection that they need in order to thrive. My answer (and I am pretty sure that it is Heller’s too) is to create a “village” or clan consisting of friends, neighbors, mothers helpers, elders and one’s greater community to help a family to raise loving and balanced children. Our parents live in New England, so my husband and I befriended an elderly neighbor who lives nearby. She calls me weekly to check in on me and my daughter. I have another older female friend who e-mails me frequently and is always concerned about my daughter and me. My husband’s college and work friends and my own “mommy” friends have become like aunts and uncles to my daughter. I am still working on finding a responsible and loving teenager to act as “big sister” to my daughter, although our neighbors’ 5 year old and 4 year old who follow my husband and daughter to the park each day seem to love Annabelle as they might love their own cousin. Last, I rely upon a great community of parents in my local moms’ groups, La Leche League, and Attachment Parenting group. Perhaps someday, our local schools will be participate in helping our family raise healthy and loving children. Together, if we choose to be loving and compassionate with our own and each others’ children, those of us who live far away from our biological families can reap the benefits of having a family consisting of friends and neighbors–we can be today’s village, that of the modern, industrial world.

5. Parents who blog or web-publish about traveling with their toddlers. I wrote that with a smile but I mean it with all seriousness. To travel from D.C. to New England, our family followed the American road tradition and piled up our car, got in, and drove a far distance to reach our destination. I am truly thankful to other bloggers and web writers out there who shared their secrets to happy, stress-free travel with toddlers My friend Rebecca recommended that I pack snacks and new toys and books to distract Annabelle from sour moods, my husband’s co-worker suggested we bring children’s programs and a portable DVD player, and as mentioned, several great web-sites gave tips on what worked on the road to beat their own kids’ boredom. Thanks to all of the suggestions, our family enjoyed a pleasant drive with lots of fun and only a little crying and frustration. Here are a few of my favorite toddler travel tip sites:

Toddler Travel Tips

“Road Trip Survival Guide” by Baby Center

Mom’s Minivan.com

I will keep folks posted about my brother-in-law’s health, and in the meantime, we appreciate all the positive thoughts, energy, and prayers you might direct towards him and our family. I’ll be around as much as possible and hopefully I’ll learn a bit about environmental efforts at our “home” away from home.

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This week’s Gratitude post is inspired by a wonderful book by Sharon Heller, Ph.D. entitled The Vital Touch: How Intimate Contact with Your Baby Leads to Happier, Healthier Development. The Vital Touch, and as indicated in the title, discusses the importance of touch and intimacy between parents and their babies, especially in the industrialized culture of the modernized world. Some of my favorite passages from The Vital Touch challenged me to examine my own attempts at being compassionate and affectionate while parenting. And, like any thoughtful and loving parent, I wondered whether or not I give my daughter the adequate love and care needed as she journeys from infancy to toddlerhood and onward to her pre-school years. Below are 5 outstanding reasons why I am loving The Vital Touch; let’s begin with birth:

1. Doulas. “The doula has an incredible ability to mitigate maternal stress and to influence the progress of labor” (20). Sharon Heller’s cites that the presence of doulas with laboring mothers reduces C-sections by 50% (or more) and the length of labor by 25%. Heller also cites an anecdote from the renowned pediatrician T. Berry Brazelton, about a laboring Mayan Indian mother whose labor stopped when her mid-wife left the room–everything that Brazelton tried to do to restart her labor failed. When the mid-wife returned to the laboring mother, her labor restarted and she delivered as normal. Why are doulas such a powerful force for laboring women? According to Heller’s research: “Through touch, [the doula] taps into the mother’s feelings, into her need for reassurance and for nurturance. And through touch she taps the mind’s own drugstore, releasing endorphins–a natural pain killer–and raising the level of serotonin in the mother’s bloodstream, relieving depression” (20).

Considering a doula’s magical touch in aiding the progression of labor and in the relief of pain during labor, parents opting for no interventions and a drug free birth may find the support they need in a doula. While I did not seek a doula for my last birth experience, I’ve been told that doulas are wonderful birth assistants for fathers too, keeping dad comfortable and helping him to understand the natural progression of labor.

2. Skin-to-skin contact. “Our first experience is the warmth of other bodies,” writes Heller. She explains that skin-to-skin contact comforts and soothes babies, helps regulates their body temperature (since mothers act as natural thermostats for their babies), decreases the release of the stress hormone cortisol in newborns, and when combined with stroking, increases preemie and newborn weight gain.

When I gave birth to Annabelle, she was placed upon my stomach and seemed to inch up towards my breasts to nurse. We lay there together, skin-to-skin, an unbelievable way to spend my first moments with the child I had waited so long to meet. From this first meeting, I nursed her on demand and held her whenever she cried for me to comfort her. Considering that she arrived 3 weeks early and weighed less than 6 lbs., I was grateful to learn that she not only maintained her birth weight but gained a few ounces by the time we took her to her first pediatric appointment, just days after she was born.

3. The embrace. Heller rightly states that by holding our babies close against our bodies, “the embrace is the ultimate baby pacifier” (46). She goes on to explain that the more often that babies are held, the more stable and secure they feel–not having to panic each time they are separated from their mothers for diapering, riding in the car, or lying in a crib. A baby, she notes, is “designed for continual contact,” which can offset problems of self-esteem and detachment from one’s own body later in life.

By holding our newborns, infants, toddlers, and older children when they need us, we offer them the love they’ll need for a better sense of security throughout their lives. My own experiences as a mother are new, so I cannot attest to whether or not providing continual contact to my baby results in a healthy, emotionally balanced older child and later adult; but what I can share is that continual contact with me and her father in the early months has meant that now, at 18 months, she is incredibly outgoing and takes on the world with determination, often leading me and her father to explore new places and try new things with her.   If you had asked one of her grandparents whether they predicted that our “clinging” and “attached” baby would turn into a toddler who’s ready for adventure, they likely would have said no.  So, so far, I’m grateful we gave her the continual contact she so prominently demanded in infancy.

4. Breastfeeding.  Heller not only opens up a worthwhile discussion of the sensuality of breastfeeding and whether or not a visible breast ought to be considered provocative, but she also details the many benefits of breastfeeding for both mother and child: 1) it’s a complete nutritional source of food “supplying  . . . 37 known immune mechanisms”; 2) reduces food allergies and regulates digestive functions; 3) protects against cancer, diabetes, and other health problems; 4) may protect against obesity; 5) may increase IQ by 8 points due to DHA, an omega-3 fat that aids in brain development; 6) reduces gas and indigestion;  7) completes the mother’s reproductive cycle which began with pregnancy; and “is the ultimate intimate experience between mother and baby.”

Again, I can’t share a longterm outcome of my breastfeeding experience or tell you that my daughter is a certified baby genius, but what I can attest to based on Heller’s discussion of breastfeeding is that my daughter was rarely sick as a newborn, that breastfeeding her on demand helped me “regain my figure,” and also that breastfeeding my baby truly is a wonderful bonding opportunity for us both.  Biologically, it seems that mothers are programed to nurse their babies: breastfeeding helps with the release of oxytocin which “makes the mother want to hug and fondle her baby, strengthening the mother-baby bond,” and prolactin, the “mothering” hormone also rises making us want to hold and “mother” our babies.

Heller’s discussion of breastfeeding expands from these main points, and she notes the many obstacles to breastfeeding in a modern culture and how bottle feeding became popular.  I will  note that the chapters on breastfeeding are rich with information.

5.  Co-sleeping.  Heller refutes the myth that co-sleeping endangers newborn babies.  She writes: “Co-sleeping has always had a survival value, both physical and psychological.  In the past, if mother and infant shared a bed, a hammock . . . the baby was better protected from predators and stayed warm.”  She also argues that mothers sleep better with baby sleeping at her side because she can rest well knowing that her baby is okay.  For babies, who are born with an innate fear of darkness and being alone, sleeping alongside mother and father eases their anxiety and puts less stress on their systems.

Heller than takes on the arguments had by opponents to co-sleeping, which include “threat of suffocation” (she explains the history of this fear, beginning with intentional suffocating of infants among the poor who could not afford to care for another child), fear of incest, and insistence on a baby’s “self-reliance” and ability to sleep on its own (Heller juxtaposes our culture’s preoccupation with independence to Japanese culture’s ideal of interdependence.  The Japanese consider co-sleeping a model of harmony and interdependence within the family).

And what about SIDS?  Heller reports that “in urban societies where mothers and babies sleep separately, as in the United States, United Kingdom, Canada, and New Zealand, incidents of SIDS are the highest.  In urban societies where mothers and babies co-sleep, as in Hong-Kong, Stockholm, Tokyo, and Israel, incidents of SIDS are low.”

Our family, honestly, fell into co-sleeping, and our decision to sleep together as a family is an ongoing discussion between my husband and me.  Co-sleeping often leads to more frequent night wakings (a survival instinct for a baby), it also means that night wakings are shorter and less abrupt, meaning that I am able to nurse our daughter and return to sleep with ease.  Co-sleeping also increases bonding time between my husband and daughter and allows us to stay in tune with her throughout the night: hearing her breathe, noting her temperature and quickly picking up on fever, and listening to coughs, cries, etc.

Co-sleeping works and appears in various forms and situations, depending on the family.   In our family, sometimes co-sleeping means that our daughter falls asleep in her crib beside our bed and sleeps there through the night; other nights mean that she falls asleep in our bed and sleeps beside me or between the two of us.   Honestly, co-sleeping has produced a nighttime situation in our family that involves less crying (from all involved) and easy, convenient nursing for me and my daughter.

Heller’s The Vital Touch has been a rewarding read for me, challenging me to think about the choices that our family is making as we raise our daughter.  I hope my 5 favorite parts about this book have been helpful for those interested in the book and in attachment parenting.  E-mail me or comment if you have or plan to read the book.

Cheers,

Green Mamma

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